Transitioning to graduate school can be a difficult process. Sometimes beginning a new program and moving to a new place can feel like an isolating experience. Building a community and making friends is an important step to feeling a sense of belonging in your program. The importance of your community and friendships doesn’t end at the beginning of your program. As you progress, research, internships, coursework, and teaching can all cause stress and anxiety. The relationships that you build will help you cope with these stressors.
Below, I talk about a few things that I did to build my community and find friendships during my graduate experiences.
Get Involved
1. Join Campus Organizations
Universities are usually host to hundreds of organizations that can range from sport groups to service groups to professional societies. Typically, universities hold “tabling” events for organizations where new (and current) students can meet and greet organization members. These tabling events usually happen at the beginning of the school year and new semesters.
In addition to tabling events, you can also find lists of established organizations on your university website. You definitely don’t have to wait until a tabling event happens to join a club. Most campus organizations have social media pages and email information that you can access any time of year.
On-campus organizations offer opportunities for students with similar interests to meet one another and give back to the local community. These organizations also provide leadership opportunities for members. Typically, organizations have elected officials (e.g., President, Vice President, Treasurer, etc.) that are open to student membership. Leadership in campus organizations can be a very effective experience to list on your resume regardless of your career path.
2. Join a Professional Society
Professional societies are groups that aim to promote and accomplish goals associated with people engaged in a specific profession. An example of a professional society that I participate in is the American Fisheries Society. There are professional societies for every field, and they can provide opportunities for professional development, outreach, and social gatherings.
Professional societies generally have national, regional, and local groups that you can participate in. My master’s institution had a student subunit for the American Fisheries Society, but my PhD institution did not. During my second year, I established a student subunit for AFS at UCI because I wanted to build a community of fisheries professionals at UCI. I also wanted to encourage undergrads and other grad students to entertain the idea of joining the fisheries field. We participate in events on campus as well as at the state, regional, and national levels.
These societies often hold workshops for CV, social media, and website design to help participants engage with the general public.
Participating in AFS at UCI increased my social circle significantly. It is also helpful in connecting me with other professionals in our field that are not at UCI. These connections may lead to collaborations and career development down the line.
3. Attend university and departmental events
Universities frequently host events at their libraries and through various departments around campus. These events can include anything from poster research sessions, book signings, cocktail hours, or galas. They are great opportunities to meet new people.
Many departments hold specific events and programs such as holiday parties and weekly seminars for graduate students and faculty to mingle. You can find information on these events through university and departmental listserv emails. So make sure you are included on the departmental email list soon after starting the program.
4. Join a mentorship program
Many universities offer mentorship programs for incoming students regardless of your status as an international or domestic student. These mentorship programs pair mentors (professors or continuing students) with mentees (new incoming students). These programs send out helpful information regarding transitioning to graduate school and the area around the university. They also host social events for mentees to meet mentors and other participants.
In addition to mentorship programs for incoming students, universities also hold programs for continuing graduate students. These programs generally focus on networking and retention and engagement of current students. You can reach out to the graduate division at your school or navigate the university website to find these opportunities.
5. Join a sport
Don’t skip this if you never grew up playing sports!
Sports are a great way to find and make friends – even if you don’t have previous experience with a given sport. For example, I joined the cycling team during my undergraduate studies. The last time I rode a bike before college was probably when I was 10 years old! Needless to say, I fell off my bike a lot in the beginning of my time on the cycling team.
I didn’t realize how important my experiences on the cycling team would be when I joined it. I gained lifelong best friends and a new sport that I could continue to do for the rest of my life. In fact, many of the friends that I made in new cities have been through cycling and running.
Sports can be NCAA (e.g., Division 1 or D2, which can recruit students to the university for the sport), club (may or may not require tryouts but are not as competitive as NCAA), and intramural (all students are eligible to participate). Because of the different levels available to students, there is always a skill level to accommodate anyone no matter how new or experienced they are.
Additionally, many on campus gyms will offer sport classes like tennis or fencing through their recreation programs. These recreational programs are often much more affordable than anything you’d find at a lawn and tennis club.
6. Explore Adventure
If you are interested in the outdoors, this point is for you! Many universities have outdoor recreation programs where you can find opportunities for outdoor trips with groups of other students. These trips can range from anything as relaxed as local hikes to multiday backpacking trips. Here, you can meet other students who share an interest in outdoor activities.
It can be difficult to get into equipment and experience heavy hobbies like rock climbing and backpacking but these recreation programs offer a unique opportunity to rent equipment and go with skilled guides. Some of the universities I attended even had outdoor recreation orientations where new students would go on backpacking trips to surf in Baja Mexico or camping in local parks.
7. Volunteer
With everything on your plate as a graduate student, it may be difficult to find time to volunteer. But if you do find time, it will be a rewarding experience. I have volunteered at animal shelters, wildlife rehabilitation centers, and through educational outreach programs. These experiences connected me with people who I may never have met through my graduate studies but who all enjoy giving back to the community as much as I do.
Are you passionate about animals? Look for local shelters and ASPCAs that you may be able to help out in. Do you enjoy working with kids and in education? See if your school provides opportunities for outreach with local kids. If not, check local Boys and Girls clubs or the YMCA to see if they need volunteers for after school programs.
Put Yourself Out There + Be Open Minded
I am an introvert. I get very anxious at the thought of speaking to people that I don’t know. But when I do approach others and begin a conversation, I am always happy I did. Just striking up a conversation with someone who is a stranger to you can lead to a lifelong friendship.
Don’t be afraid to try to meet people who seem like they may have already formed a ‘group’. We aren’t in high school anymore, so cliques don’t exist to the extent they used to.
We live in a world that is increasingly divided. Social media has allowed us to make judgements about people and their actions without even being in a situation with them. I find that most people, no matter how different I may perceive them being from me, have shared and common interests that we can bond together over.
Diversity is important. I find that speaking with people who have different opinions than me is just as important as meeting people who have shared interests with me. (Of course, the caveat being – if someone is rude or toxic towards you, you do not need to continue associating with them.)
Conclusion
Getting involved with extracurriculars during your program can seem impossible with the other demands of graduate school but it is valuable. Finding people who understand the struggles that you are facing will help validate your feelings. They can also provide opportunities for you to learn to cope with your struggles in a new way. Meeting people outside of your immediate social circle can diversify the way that you think. It can build your skillset in communicating with people from a variety of backgrounds. This is important for your future as a team member in your career, too!
Good luck navigating all of the opportunities that present themselves during your graduate journey.
As always, please let me know if you have any thoughts or questions by dropping them in the comments! If you’d like to read more about my adventures in graduate school, click here. You can also find me on Medium.